instead, i made tea and thought about all the secrets we shared over a decade ago. all those whispers in the dark.
which didn't help any.
and then i googled "why people shouldn't date when newly sober".
and then i read. and it made sense.
and then i sipped more tea and went back to my book.
still, you linger. and i wonder. and imagine those words coming out of my mouth.
what do i even want? is it even fair? it can't be fair. it's not fair. i shouldn't.
this is stupid. is it stupid?